Weird Shit Velcro – Stories About Navigating The Human Landscape

I have captivated all of my friends and family for many years with my dating and daily life stories. Thus, this blog is my opportunity to share these amusing and ridiculous anecdotes with anyone who is interested, bored with their life, passing time or just has the awesome, shit ass luck to run upon it by chance. If nothing else, you will be entertained…start with March 20 "You will be entertained….too good to make up."


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I’ve hit the Northern California wall….

As you may have surmised from the two riveting blog posts I have written in the past week, sadly, I had pretty much decided that Northern CA is not for me. That said, I had a decent day, reconnected with an old friend which was really nice and attended a work conference that was more interesting than I had imagined pretty much solely because of one presenter that I think has come up with a genius idea of medical diagnoses via crowd sourcing with a gamification component as well as a social good aspect – check out – fantastic idea!

Anyway, I finally came back to the place I am subletting, lay on the couch and talked to Trip who embodies NYC which I can’t believe I actually miss. We hang up after an hour and I opened a note that was left on my door.  It literally read as follows: “My sleep has been disrupted for the last week and a half. Crazy music from 5am-730am along with an alarm on most days from 715-till 730am. I’ve been awakened at 230am with more crazy music followed by more sounds. It is now over being able to listen to another night. Management has been notified. Police next.” WTF!

So first of all I am almost never awake at 5am unless I had a crazy night out and am going to bed at 5ish. Second, I don’t even have a radio here and can barely work the TV as crazy as it sounds it isn’t even in the realm of possibility.  Most nights I have been out and come home to purely sleep. Let’s put it this way….I called said extremely old writer of said note, apologized (for nothing but why not try) and explained that I only WISH I have had something going at those hours to have had music playing. She was not amused and  screamed at me because I called her “ma’am” which I thought was polite.  I then questioned the construction noises that have permeated my sleep on the weekends at inopportune hours which apparently is her construction and she informed me that she is on the board. So I guess time of construction doesn’t matter. OK! People out here do not get east coast sarcasm. AT ALL. I have officially thrown in the towel.  I am scared for what tomorrow brings…..I may be a bit homesick. And need a cup of tea….